Ronald E. Breaker is a native of Jacksonville’s Eastside. He served 21 years in the United States Army. His journey to becoming a straight ally began by re-evaluating his old thoughts and beliefs. In his statement, he encourages why it’s time for Jacksonville to do the same. Read more from his ally profile here: http://wp.me/p3PnKk-hj
We Are Straight Allies sends a huge “thank you” to Arbus Magazine, along with publisher Cinda Sherman and journalist Wesley Grissom, for their feature article in this month’s edition and their unwavering commitment to equality.
View the article in its entirety here: http://www.bluetoad.com/publication/?i=215886&p=12
Meet Matthew and Jill Calise. Matthew J. Calise is a native of Jacksonville, Florida and a proud supporter of his hometown. With a diverse upbringing, he found a passion in the arts. Matthew graduated from Douglas Anderson School of the Arts and now proudly serves on the Alumni Board. He has been a long time friend, volunteer, and advocate of Theatre Jacksonville, Players by the Sea, and the 5 & Dime Theatre Company. After high school, he attended Florida State College at Jacksonville where he received his Associate in the Arts degree. Matthew then moved to Tallahassee to pursue one of his dreams of graduating from Florida State University with degrees in both marketing and management. He began his professional career with the Wounded Warrior Project, and is now a marketing coordinator for Swisher International, Inc.
Jill Flowers Calise was born in 1954 in Norfolk, Virginia, to Max and Lantha Flowers (a proud Navy family) along with their first daughter, Cindy. Jill attended Duval County Public Schools, Cedar Hills Elementary, JEB Stuart Jr. High School and N. B. Forrest High School. She pursued a teaching degree at the University of Florida and attained a Masters Degree in Educational Leadership from the University of North Florida.
Jill considers herself a patriot and LOVES America. She is passionate about teaching and loves the students she serves. She goes home every day from teaching to two of her other great passions, gardening and her little dog, Gizmo.
We are incredibly grateful that Matthew visited our booth at One Spark this year and bravely chose to share his family’s story with us. Matthew’s parents, James (Jimmy) and Jill Calise, were married a little more than 25 years ago. It was through her sister, Cindy, and her daughter, Jill Anne, that Jill met Jimmy in 1987. One month before their wedding day, Jimmy learned that he was HIV positive. After sharing the news with Jill, he thought maybe they should call off the ceremony. After careful consideration, Jill knew she still very much wanted to marry Jimmy. Above all, they loved each other very much and she knew that would get them through any challenge life had ready for them.
In 1988, Jimmy and Jill married and the next year in May of 1989, they had Matthew. His name means, “gift from God.” Jimmy and Jill lived as a couple for 8 years before deciding that Jimmy needed to openly live his truth. So, when Matthew was 7-years-old, his father came out to him as gay. At the time, Matthew says he didn’t fully understand what ‘being gay’ meant, but he clearly remembers how challenging life had been for his parents because of this fact. Jimmy was disowned by by some of his family members and friends. Matthew also found it difficult to be open with his friends about who his father was.
It wasn’t until Matthew was almost to middle school that his father’s HIV had progressed into AIDS. Knowing that he didn’t have much time left, Jimmy’s only hope was that he would live long enough to see Matthew graduate from high school. Matthew was just shy of 16 when his father passed away. To honor the impact that Jimmy had on their lives, the wonderful father he was, and the great man he had been, Matthew and Jill each got a tattoo that they display with great pride. Jill and Matthew are still very close. She tells those she meets, that they are “as thick as thieves.”
Their story seems uncommon, but they are not alone. Today, many people live ‘under cover’ for fear of discrimination, abandonment, or threats of violence simply because of who they are, or who they love. We have lost millions of spouses, loved ones, children, sisters, brothers, mothers, and fathers due to complications from AIDS while millions more currently live with HIV. In their statement, Matthew and Jill explain why it was important to them to join the ‘We Are Straight Allies’ community, “In our family, we believe that it takes a village to raise a child. We also believe it takes a village to make a change and create a movement. Today, we become a proud part of that community. One that believes in both love and equality for all.”
We appreciate the Calise family’s willingness to share their story in hopes that our community will begin to celebrate our differences, rather than fear them.
We’d also like to thank the Florida Times-Union for also sharing Matthew and Jill’s story with their readers on this very special Father’s Day.
To learn more about HIV/AIDS, please visit AIDS.gov
Shavuot is the Hebrew word for “weeks” and refers to the Jewish festival marking the giving of the Torah at Mount Sinai, which occurs seven weeks after Passover – the exodus from Egypt and the liberation from slavery. Shavuot, like many other Jewish holidays, began as an ancient agricultural festival that marked the end of the spring barley harvest and the beginning of the summer wheat harvest. In ancient times, Shavuot was a pilgrimage festival during which Israelites brought crop offerings to the Temple in Jerusalem. Today, it is a celebration of Torah, education, and actively choosing to participate in Jewish life.
This year, according to the Jewish calendar, Shavuot is celebrated from sundown June 3rd through sundown on June 5th. Since Shavuot is an ancient pilgrimage holiday, most of the celebration rituals focus on the community – namely, the celebration of words. Traditionally, those of Jewish faith study the Torah beginning at nightfall of the first day of the festival. Today, the community gathers for the reading of the 10 commandments, along with the stories of Ezekiel and Ruth. In Christian tradition, this celebration, known as Pentecost – the coming of the Holy Spirit, happens on June 8th. In that gathering Words suddenly dissolved and multiplied into hearing and speaking the 70 different tongues of all humanity.
Today, We Are Straight Allies celebrates our many threads of connection with the belief that the Holy Spirit moves through all languages, through all people to unify each “I” with the Divine collective of “We”. With that, we re-created Rabbi Olitzky’s image in Hebrew, as a symbol that Equality is universal…that nothing is more important than our humanity.
Berakah. Shalom. Ahabah. [Blessings. Peace. Love.]
Gracious translation credit goes to Rabbi Olitzky.
Ronald E. Breaker is a native of Jacksonville’s Eastside. He served 21 years in the United States Army, retiring as Chief Warrant Officer 2. Mr. Breaker then served for 13 years as a Department of Defense Civilian, retiring in September 1996 as a GS 13. He returned to Jacksonville with his high school sweetheart and bride of over 48 years, Barbara Lewis-Breaker. They currently reside in Historic Springfield. Presently, Mr. Breaker works as a freelance photographer. He studied photography with New York Institute of Photography in 1965 and University of North Florida in 2001. Ronald and his wife are the proud parents of four children and four grandchildren.
In his own words, Ronald shares his journey towards allyship:
My journey to this point as a straight ally has been one of reevaluating my thoughts and beliefs. When the LGBT community started framing their plight as a civil rights issue I disagreed and would often say, “they choose to be gay, and could stop if they wanted to. Being black is different, I don’t have a choice.” When I think of people I have known as early as 3rd or 4th grade who were gay, I realized gay people could no more change their identity than I could change mine.
We live in a changing world, and when the military realized that, they knew their policies of discrimination against women and eventually LGBT members of the military had to change. It is very hard for a lot of us to accept these facts, but I believe, when you know better you do better. To that end, If Jacksonville is to become a first class NFL city it cannot discriminate against any of its citizens. Injustice against one of us is injustice against all of us.
See a video clip of his statement here:
We Are Allies 